{"product_id":"nothing-will-fix-this-shitshow-but-this-candle-smells-great-candle-scented-soy-9oz","title":"Nothing Will Fix This Shitshow But This Candle Smells Great Candle | Scented Soy 9oz","description":"A clean-burning 9oz soy candle housed in a reusable glass jar that brings a little humor and calm to chaotic days. Choose from 12 thoughtfully blended scents — from cinnamon-vanilla warmth and bright apple harvest to oceanic Atlantis Whisper or soothing White Sage + Lavender — each made with a natural soy wax blend, a 100% cotton wick, and infused with real essential oils. The label’s deadpan message adds a wry, relatable touch to living rooms, home offices, or bedside tables. Burns 50–60 hours and meets ASTM safety standards. Once the wax is gone, the jar wipes clean and becomes a small planter, pencil cup, or countertop accent.\n\nProduct features\n- Eco-friendly, vegan formulation with no parabens, plastics, or synthetic dyes\n- Reusable glass vessel — clean and repurpose after burning\n- Available in 12 curated scents, including Cinnamon Vanilla, Apple Harvest, Sea Salt + Orchid, and Unscented\n- 100% natural soy wax blend with a 100% cotton wick; 50–60 hour burn time\n- Compact 9oz size (2.8” × 3.5”) with glossy permanent label; assembled in the USA\n\nCare instructions\n- Keep burning candle within sight. Keep away from children and pets.  Never burn the candle near flammable items. \t\t\t\t\t\n","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White Sage and Lavender \/ 9oz","offer_id":44620180848685,"sku":"25721656995711286090","price":17.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Apple Harvest \/ 9oz","offer_id":44620180881453,"sku":"65240571099503048316","price":17.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cinnamon Vanilla \/ 9oz","offer_id":44620180914221,"sku":"46250197201795238313","price":17.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Christmas Warmth \/ 9oz","offer_id":44620180946989,"sku":"12234549540624248630","price":17.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Unscented \/ 9oz","offer_id":44620180979757,"sku":"22521042585087168531","price":17.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0736\/1540\/9197\/files\/6442381311641282556_2048.jpg?v=1771254213","url":"https:\/\/labsunleashed.com\/products\/nothing-will-fix-this-shitshow-but-this-candle-smells-great-candle-scented-soy-9oz","provider":"Labs Unleashed","version":"1.0","type":"link"}